One of those ubiquitous Facebook memes rolled by as I scrolled and it got me to thinking. The meme features a woman calling 911 to report that she thinks someone is breaking into her home. The 911 operator asks her if she has a gun, to which the frightened woman replies, “No, I’m afraid of guns.” The sympathetic public servant responds to this by telling her, “Well I hope you’re not afraid of dying because it’ll take us 15 minutes to get there.” The meme was posted by a gun lover and that’s what I find perplexing. Gun lovers own guns. Lots of them. There are more guns in the United States than there are people. The Constitution and the courts have the gun lovers’ backs, and the NRA pumps cash into political campaign coffers to ensure no legislation that would upset gun lovers ever gets created. So why aren’t gun lovers happy? They should be grinning ear to ear whistling zippity fucking doo dah every calendar day. They aren’t happy because they need something to rail against. They need something to complain about. They need to be slighted, offended, outraged and moved to anger, but they aren’t alone.
We complain about traffic, traffic lights, quality of road construction, other drivers, the price of gas, the long wait for an oil change and even the sun in our eyes on early morning commutes. We ridicule weather forecasters, newscasters, commercials, the speed of our internet connection, the short battery life on our smartphones. We bitch about the other team, the guys calling play by play, how long it takes between seasons of Game of Thrones. Even those who’ve been promised Paradise for all eternity aren’t happy. They complain that more people don’t want to go to Paradise too.
There’s plenty of misery to go around with disease, war, famine, natural disaster, accidental death, and the coming population bottleneck and climactic apocalypse, so perhaps its perfectly understandable that we’re all just freaking cranky, bitching, sarcastic, belligerent curmudgeons.